Now That I'm in My 30s, Meeting Friends Feels Like Work
Just scheduling a meetup takes two weeks, and since everyone's either raising kids or working late, I end up with only about two friends left.
Even with those two, we only meet about once every six months, but somehow it still feels comfortable. Maybe it's okay that things have dwindled this much.
7 answers
Agreed.
If you can meet someone after half a year and it’s not awkward, that doesn’t mean they just stayed—it means they truly stayed. The rest are just connections that came and went, yeah.
Well, I'd say there's a difference between only two people being left and two people being enough. In the end, it means there's a bit of regret in a corner of your heart. The fact that you keep telling yourself it's okay is proof of the opposite.
We used to send hundreds of messages a day in the group chat, but now the only thing that gets posted is birthday stickers lol. A friend who’s raising a kid says they feel bad even just reaching out. So I’ve stopped initiating contact too. But when we actually meet up after six months, we’re back to the way we used to be within three minutes. That’s what’s amazing.
Your friend count shrinking is something everyone goes through as they get older, so don’t worry about it. What matters more than the number is whether you feel comfortable when you hang out.
If it’s hard to schedule meetups, just lock it in as a recurring gathering. Like the second Saturday of every month. And give up expecting replies on KakaoTalk. I’ve got one group that’s been going for two years this way. If there’s no set occasion, you really end up never meeting.
If I meet even two people every six months, I'd say I'm doing pretty well at keeping up lol. Last year, I met one person. And that was only after our plans fell through twice.