Son-in-law
Overview
A son-in-law (사위) is a kinship term referring to a daughter's husband and forms a core axis of the in-law relationship established through marriage. Because it is a relationship formed by marriage rather than blood, legal status and social expectations have varied greatly across periods, and in Korean society the traditionally hierarchical relationship with the father-in-law and mother-in-law has recently been undergoing rapid horizontal restructuring.
Key Content
Definition and Scope
A son-in-law is the term for one's own daughter's husband, and the corresponding terms in the opposite direction are father-in-law (장인, wife's father) and mother-in-law (장모, wife's mother). The son-in-law's parents and the father-in-law and mother-in-law are connected through a sa-don (사돈, in-law) relationship. Legally, a son-in-law is an in-law relative, and under civil law is treated as one of the kinship relations arising from marriage. In Sino-Korean characters, it is written as 壻 or the character seo (서) meaning son-in-law, and since ancient times it has frequently appeared as a subject in literature and proverbs.
Position in Traditional Society
In the traditional patriarchal society, a son-in-law held a considerably subordinate position in relation to his wife's family. Especially in households where the father-in-law held authority, the son-in-law was effectively placed between a guest and a member, and the practices of living with the wife's family (처가살이) and the deuril-son-in-law (데릴사위) system institutionally supported this relationship. The deuril-son-in-law was a marriage form in which, in a household without sons, the daughter's husband was brought in to live together in order to continue the property and family line; it was an arrangement in which the wife's family's economic needs and the son-in-law's livelihood intersected. On the other hand, many proverbs and stories emphasizing intimacy between father-in-law and son-in-law have also been passed down, showing that the relationship was not uniformly oppressive.
Forms of Address and Etiquette
A long-standing custom in the wife's family was to call the son-in-law by attaching his child's name instead of his given name or to use the title 'seobangnim' (서방님). It was considered a virtue for the father-in-law and mother-in-law to treat the son-in-law with courtesy while maintaining a sense of distance, and the division of roles at holidays and ancestral rites was also a mechanism defining the son-in-law's position. The extent to which a son-in-law participated in the wife's family's ancestral rites, the use of forms of address with the wife's brothers and younger sisters, and similar practices varied greatly by region and household.
Cultural Representations
The son-in-law repeatedly appears in folktales and TV dramas as a figure symbolizing conflict and harmony with the wife's family. The confrontation between father-in-law and son-in-law is a staple subject of comedy, and recently narratives in which the son-in-law appears as the actual caregiving subject for the wife's family have increased. The proverb 'Love for a son-in-law is love for a mother-in-law' (사위 사랑은 장모 사랑) compactly expresses the custom of the wife's family treating the son-in-law with special care.
Legal and Economic Aspects
Although a son-in-law does not have the same status as a lineal blood relative in inheritance or parental authority, he has broad practical interests, including registration as a dependent under health insurance, caregiving and support for the father-in-law and mother-in-law, and personal deductions in inheritance tax and gift tax. Recently, as cases in which a son-in-law and the wife's family jointly prepare housing or run a business together have increased, legal disputes over property relations are also on the rise.
Recent Trends
As of 2024–2025, discourse surrounding sons-in-law is changing in three directions. First, changes in forms of address. As many young couples choose to call each other by given names even in the wife's family or to unify address to the father-in-law and mother-in-law as father and mother, the traditional address system is loosening. Second, changes in the subject of care. With aging and the increase in single-person households, the son-in-law's role in nursing and caring for the wife's parents has become institutionally important, and cases in which the son-in-law appears as a practical decision-maker in family consultations related to long-term care are increasing. Third, in content and media, the trend is clear in which the relationship between father-in-law and son-in-law is reconstructed away from authoritative confrontation into a narrative of intergenerational empathy and cooperation. In addition, as a culture of consultation over holiday visit arrangements and division of roles in ancestral rites spreads, the son-in-law's position within the wife's family is moving in the direction of being determined not by norms but by agreement between the couple.
Related Topics
- [[Father-in-law]]
- [[Mother-in-law]]
- [[In-law relationship]]
- [[Living with the wife's family]]
- [[Deuril son-in-law]]
- [[Family system]]
- [[Forms of address]]